Not a good blogger

OK, I haven't been a good blogger - nothing posted since last November.

That's not to say there's been nothing to write about. I just wasn't sure anyone would actually be interested in reading any of it. I know I said this was for myself and I didn't care if anybody read it; but then I started asking myself what was the point of spending time on a blog? Life got in the road - last year's chicken massacre, neighbours crashing through our fence and dealing with the insurance company for months (!), work, family, autism, Christmas, New Year, wedding anniversary, birthdays, art, my i-Pad, cutting up timber for the winter, watching movies and TV shows, Pinterest, more fox attacks -- you get the point -- all the same things everyone else deals with. So it's all stored away - on notes, sheets of  paper (much to Kelly's annoyance) and diary pages and in my head.

Plus I finally decided to check out Twitter in February and have spent most my spare time on there, quickly becoming addicted and discovering lots of really great people. My autism family on Twitter is very special to me and everyone is supportive of each other. I thought I learned a lot reading blogs around this time last year. However, Twitter has been a real eye-opener and I can't believe how many similar people there are with similar experiences, similar doubts and similar concerns.

My Twitter timeline is just as eclectic as my life - tweeting about #autism, #art, #Sharks (not the #Sharknado type), #Will, #work, the #TDF, #chickens, #cactus, #TV, #movies, #work and so on.

I used to think I was the only person in the world who thought like I did, who had strange addictions, who made lists, who had to have complete sets of that addiction and so on. No, there are lots of others who have been doing the same thing for as long as I have! Yes, I find that amazing, earth-shattering almost but mainly a relief.

When I was diagnosed with Aspergers, it was a relief. I know some people can't handle hearing the diagnosis but for me it was a relief. It was like a veil had been lifted and I finally knew there was a reason at least for the way I thought and felt and dealt with life. It explained so much about my childhood, my troubles at school and the agony of trying to fit in.

Will's diagnosis of autism two months earlier was a similar relief which some people might find odd. There was no sense in denying it. There was no sense in trying to blame someone or something (Andrew Wakefield and "vaccination causes autism" nuts rile me like nothing else on the planet). We missed out on accessing early-intervention programs but Kelly and I had been doing our own early intervention with Will without even knowing it. But, as I said, it was a relief because it explained so much. I always wondered why Will would never say "hello" to other kids at school for example. Autism explained why that, and so much more, was so.

Life as I know it sometimes doesn't make sense so it's good to find some answers!

Why blog?

I’ve been making diary notes and jotting down thoughts over the past two years on what it’s like dealing with autism in my family and have plans to eventually write a book, just for the personal satisfaction mainly and maybe preserving “family history” in some small way.

In September I decided that starting a blog would be a good outlet for some of these thoughts, regardless of whether anybody else actually reads it.

In the past month, since my first post, I’ve discovered numerous autism and asperger blogs, many of which are fascinating. It’s been a revelation to find all these other people with similar experiences to myself. Reading the words, a lot of the posts could easily be describing me. Amazing that there are so many shared experiences and that there are so many people who have been diagnosed later in life.

Growing up, I remember “fitting in” until I was 12, 13 or so then always felt my divergent interests, and the fact that the thoughts and feelings in my aspergian mind couldn’t connect to my friends any more, put me at odds with those friends. I never wanted to be a “sheep” though and have always been defiant in sticking to those interests and not following trends.

While everyone else was listening to Abba, I was listening to The Clash. While everyone else was getting drunk, I was at the cinema watching a movie. While everyone else was watching mindless action or frat-boy movies, I was discovering Casablanca, A Clockwork Orange and other more intelligent fare. While everyone else was driving fast cars I was a passenger, observing, taking notes and writing it all down.

I’ve always been interested in writing and wrote a tenpin bowling column (of all things) for my local newspaper for a decade (1990s) as well as an online version, before blogs were blogs really. I also wrote lots of fiction and had some sci-fi short stories published in my early twenties.

It’s also been rewarding reading about other people dealing with autistic children. For a while after Will’s diagnosis it was tough to deal with and felt very isolating. It seemed we were the only ones fighting the good fight to help our child. Gradually Will has met other autistic children through an Outreach program and Kelly has become good friends with some of the other mothers.

I didn’t intend on such a big gap between posts but a couple of days after my first post, a fox came onto our property and killed 16 of our chooks (Australian slang for chickens) in the middle of the day. That was devastating to Will, my wife Kelly and me.